I am in such a quandry about how and even why to get married. I have been with my partner for 10 years and we are both anxious about securing each others rights in the event of death or serious illness. We recently bought a buy to let and our solicitor advised we should get married as that provides better protection than a will.
Trouble is, the whole ceremony thing leaves me ice cold and it seems that englilsh registrary offices (certainly true of my local one in Lincoln) can only think in terms of "ceremony" and when I asked if we could sit at a desk and crack on, they looked at me as if i was talking a different language. We love each other, dont get me wrong, but again a sloppy loved up thing is just not what we want, this is about practicalities!
I am considering Edinburgh or Dublin as I am keen to make this commitment outside of Brexitland, Amsterdam was a consideration but that also seemed complex.
I guess what I am asking is, doyou know any great forums or spaces where I can find people similarly ceremonyphobic or who have found legal ways to secure our "will"?
I am also ceremony phobic. Can't stand the fuss. All I can say is that my parents were married without ceremony in 1952 in a registry office in Penzance. They didn't even exchange vows - just signed the register. They were Plymouth Brethren, an exclusive Christian sect, and they didn't believe in such ceremonies - they just had a 'meeting' afterwards. They did dress smart thought, but not white dress and veil thing. I am surprised you can't still do the same where you are. Let us know if you find somewhere to get what you want.
I do know that the advice given is true, there are many benefits from a marriage contract which you would do well to consider. Considerably more than civil partnership I have been told. Cheers. Simon.
Thanks for your post. It's quite the quandary for people who don't want to get married or have a civil partnership but also want the same protections. As far as I'm aware, your solicitor is right, and in order to receive those sorts of protections you will need a civil partnership or marriage, but maybe it's worth consulting an LGBT organisation that can help? Stonewall actually has an advice line that can help consult on these sorts of rights: